Five and a half years in BJJ. Today I tapped a guy I used to lose to every single round. Same guy, same training partner, three years ago he could pass my guard in 90 seconds. Tonight I caught him in a triangle off a failed knee-cut. The wild part isn't that I beat him — it's that I knew I was going to before he started passing. Confidence in BJJ is a lagging indicator of reps. You can't fake it. You can't talk yourself into it. You earn it on the mats over years.
Rolled with a brown belt from Renzo NYC who was in town. She's 110 lb. I'm 130. She made me feel small. The way she changes levels and grips — every grip break is also the start of the next attack. Two grips later I'm in mounted triangle. Notes from the round: tight elbows always, never let her get the cross-grip on the sleeve, and when she sits up to single — frame the shoulder, don't post.
Got my fourth stripe today. Felt weird about it because I lost the in-house tournament last weekend. Coach pulled me aside after class and said stripes are about how you train, not how you compete on one Saturday. I needed to hear that. I've been so comp-brained for so long I forgot that the work is the work whether or not it shows up on a podium.
No-gi class focus this month is leg entanglements. I've been a half-guard player for three years and I'm realizing how much my guard depends on collar grips. Take the gi away and my retention drops 40%. Drilled inside sankaku → straight ankle for 20 minutes today. The position feels disgusting and I love it. New project unlocked.
IBJJF Austin Open. Two matches, two finishes — armbar from guard in round one, RNC in semis. Lost the final on advantages to a girl who outweighed me by 8 lb in a 6-minute war. Half-guard to deep half to single-leg sweep, she based out three times. I'm not strong enough at -135 to muscle that sweep against bigger blue belts. Comp prep for March: explosive single-legs, not just technique reps.